Anyone who has travelled by Mumbai locals has seen them. Of course, I am not belittling the crowds in any other form and place of public transport, but in my experience, they are most abundant in Mumbai locals. Somewhere, in their past lives, lie the unfulfilled desires of hangers not hanging enough. One of the greatest mysteries that this city of dreamers can offer you – Meet the Door Hangers.
These are the souls who experience boundless joys in putting their entire lives at risk by standing precisely with 2.89 inches of their feet on the train, their hands on the supporting metal post, and a carefree wind running through their hair, carrying all the faecal stench the Mumbai Suburban Railway can offer.
If you’re wondering, out of sympathy, whether they do it because it’s hot inside the train, hear it from someone who has been inside the train – it’s not unless it’s devilishly crowded. And it’s not always devilishly crowded as some would have you believe. But the hangers are always there – as if the sole purpose in their daily commute is to please some unknown god of hanging, so that he bestows upon them titles only worthy of the bravest and most resilient hangers – hangers who didn’t give up in the face of boarding crowds, hangers who yanked their positions from losers by boarding an empty carriage and simply standing there, blocking everyone behind them – truly the bravest of them all.
One particular advantage that the logician inside you will bring up is the possibility of getting off early and running to the stairs to catch a connecting train. That is if most of them were looking at connecting trains, which they aren’t. Trust me, I TAKE CONNECTING TRAINS.
People, people – I know this city has a reputation of being fast paced and never sleeping. While the latter I have confirmed to be an exaggeration (it merely sleeps late and wakes up early, something I have started mimicking too), the former is mostly interpreted as a means to slow each other down. No, jumping off a running train to jump on the next running train will get you nowhere that could be worth this risk (and inconvenience to the people in front of whom you’re doing your ritualistic offering dance to the hanging god).
On the other hand, I’ve never really hung out with these guys, so I probably shouldn’t be judging them, eh?
Arnab Mukherjee 